duocphamnovaco のバックアップ(No.4)

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Right You're right, Dee. If they're dangerous they must exist. But what I meant to say, and missed the mark, was, men like that do exist but they are not suitable mates. The wonderful, stars in the eyes kind of guy who also does that, he's the one I don't feel exists.

I'm not going to do your homework for you. There are BDSM checklists out there on the net and there are plenty of things a man could do with you that might well ring your chimes. Go and study.

"Pat"

by a Taken In Hand reader on 2004 Dec 22 - 20:02 | reply to this comment Right No more "homework" is needed on my part, Pat. You are once again assuming to know more about me than you do. I've read up on BDSM for about ten years, belong to a few discussion lists, have met plenty of people in the "scene." It just does not appeal to me much, that's all.

I'm not interested in all the "playing" and the "protocol" and the ritualized behavior and the posturing I see going on. And washing a man's socks is far more interesting to me than ball gags and nipple clamps. That's not to say that there are no BDSM-type activities that I enjoy, but I don't particularly think of them as BDSM. I've seen various "checklists" and probably 90% of the activities listed have either zero or negative appeal for me.

Most of all, I find the BDSM/kink/leather community unappealing because of their inclusion of all varieties of D/s. I am only interested in masculine domination and feminine submission; and I find the opposite downright repugnant, personally. That does not mean that I'm "narrow-minded" or that I would interfere with their right to their own preferences. It just means that I have a right to my preferences, too.

I don't mind gay men's D/s at all, and sometimes even find it appealing, in a naughtily voyeuristic way. But I really don't like to see women posturing at sexual "domination" - it doesn't seem natural to me, or authentic. Mainly, Femdom/malesub is a big turn-off for me, because what I most enjoy seeing is men dominating women, so something that's the exact opposite of what I find most appealing is very unappealing.